Happy New Year! A greeting full of possibilities. It certainly started well. Hogmanay in Edinburgh amongst the company of friends, haggis in whiskey sauce and the promise of a soul destroying hangover the next day.
So what has happened since last we met? I started my new job. My commute is only 1 1/2 hours. Not a whiff of Red Bull but unfortunately a large man who has perfected the art of the irritating public snore. Can't complain though, PSP for Christmas and once I'm plugged into that even Kylie's amorous advances would go un-noticed. So work is good and the commute not bad. Two boxes checked. What about everything else?
There's a real sense that I haven't moved any further forward. The divorce still hasn't come through and my ex-wife is still making financial demands that I'm convinced are going to ruin me. I get to see the children once a month, but they are not allowed to visit me, so at the end of the weekend Daddy goes off into the ether and they have no idea to where.
Its in the hands of the lawyers and I hope to god it gets resolved quickly so we can all just get on with our lives. I had the children for two days before Christmas and that was one of the hardest moments in this whole affair. They were so excited, talking non-stop about how good they had been and how many presants they were going to get. My anxious son asking whether he could trade off a promise of good behaviour in 2006 to secure him extra goodies. We had a Christmas meal, pulled crackers, wore hats and told jokes ....
.... then they had to go home to celebrate it properly. Its funny how a high can very quickly sink into the deepest chasms of low.
The first thing I think about when waking up is the children, the last thing I think about before going to sleep are the children. So why am I not with the children? They love their mother as much as they love me. I have a fabulous girlfriend she only has the children. What is the solution? Joint custody, but getting my ex-wife to agree to that has been as is going to be the biggest challenge yet.
I spent a fantastic first Christmas with my girlfriend and her family welcomed me in as one of their own. They are a great bunch who have been supportive throughout, but how much better it would have been to have two other little people there.
Maybe next year. Maybe if I'm extra good